Bob walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM.He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV. The 10:00 news was now on. The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a tall building preparing to jump.The blonde looked at Bob and said, "Do you think he’ll jump?" Bob said, "You know, I bet he’ll jump."
The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won’t."Bob placed on the bar and said, "You’re on!"Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive off of the building, falling to his death.The blonde was very upset and handed her to Bob, saying, "fair’s fair. Here’s your money."Bob replied, "I can’t take your money; I saw this earlier on the 5 o’clock news and so I knew he would jump."
The blonde replied, "I did too, but I didn’t think he’d do it again!"
A blonde decides to try horseback riding, despite having had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse’s mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse’s neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider.Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety. Unfortunately for the blonde, her foot becomes entangled in the stirrup and is now at the mercy of the horse’s pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground again and again. Her head is battered against the ground, mere moments away from unconsciousness when,Stan the Walmart manager runs out to shut the horse off.
A blonde had just gotten a new sports car and was out for a drive when she cut off a truck driver. He motioned for her to pull over. When she did, he got out of his truck and pulled a piece of chalk from his pocket. He drew a circle on the road and told the blonde to stand in the circle and not move. He then went to her car and cut up her leather seats. When he turned around she had a slight grin on her face, so he said, "Oh, you think that’s funny? Watch this." He gets a baseball bat out of his truck and breaks every window in her car. When he turns and looks at her she has a smile on her face. He is getting really mad.
He gets his knife back out and slices all her tires. Now she’s laughing. The truck driver is really starting to lose it. He goes back to his truck and gets a can of gas, pours it on her car and sets it on fire. He turns around and she is laughing so hard she is about to fall down."What’s so funny?" The truck driver asked the blonde.
She replied, "When you weren’t looking, I stepped outside the circle 4 times."
A blonde was driving down the road listening to the radio and was quite upset when she heard blonde joke after blonde joke. A little way down the road, she saw another blonde out in a field rowing a boat. The blonde stopped her car and angrily jumped out yelling,
"You dumb blonde bimbo! It’s blondes like you that give the rest of us a bad name! If I could swim I’d come out there and give you what’s coming to you!"
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