how do my lyrics sound? i wrote this a couple weeks ago, one night, and just looking for some opinions?
a couple hits’ll makes my eyes and my shoulders lean
i smoke so much weed that it has turned my eyes green
call me incredible or call me mr. hulk
**** with me i have you outlined in white chalk
so put up the yellow tape and call the police
and i ain’t snackin on you *****.es it’s a ****** feast
i eat up bitc.h rappers like i eat up with this beat
my stomach’s so full that i can’t see my feet
so call me floyd j-r because i can’t be beat
i’m the champ no doubt bit.ch envy me
i’m on top and i ain’t coming down
and you can call me king kong cause i’m on top of this town
ain’t no doubt i’m the king give me my crown.
i’m a knockout, i ain’t no knock down
i get the knockout, never the decision
swagga’s so bright that i done fuc.ked ya vision
my rhymes are so hot that i make ya ears melt
i drive em crazy on these beat fasten ya seat belt
hotter than a heater i am hotter than the sun
bit.ch i done won, you’ve been outdone
i am a machine, you just a water gun
i’m a new episode your just a rerun
i pack so much heat, that you can hear me sizzle
i steal a beat and whoop your a.ss on the instrumental
i’m at the head of the pack never in the middle
i’m ******* big time cause i don’t mess with the little
this ain’t the last rhyme that you’ll ever hear me on
but you can wave bye bye cause i’m so far gone
…… this is to the shoulder lean beat
One Response
ABCtyle
03 Mar 2010



It sounds good to me…the flow could be a little more original tho.
"ain’t no doubt i’m the king give me my crown.
i’m a knockout, i ain’t no knock down
i get the knockout, never the decision
swagga’s so bright that i done fuc.ked ya vision"
This whole style of flow is a little over done now. Wayne kind of switched it up when he said this.
Safe sex is great sex
Better wear a latex
Cuz you dont want that late text
that "I think I’m late" text
so in stead of using the reusing "knock" you could try to break it down and switch it up more
hope this helps.
Peace