emotions after a car crash?
I just recently had a car crash. A semi truck had hit me from behind and my car rolled twice and knocked down an electric box, then stopped. The car is tolled and the doctors were amazed that i only had scratches and bruises and that if i hadn’t wore my seat belt i would have been dead for sure.
Of course during the accident i was scared, but after they took me to the hospital i only felt guilt and hatred. I wasn’t scared because i knew that i wasn’t going to die and that there weren’t an serious injuries. When my parents came to the hospital i was covering up my emotions and even tried to make mom laugh so that she would stop crying and worrying.
Until now i have that little fear of what could have happened if i hadn’t wore my belt but its not like im in trauma or in phobia of ever riding a driving a car again. But my emotions of guilt and hatred are more dominate.
My mom says that it not normal for me not be scared or traumatized of the whole thing. I tell her that everyone has different reaction, but no she says that im not ‘normal’ and that Im acting like nothing happened. Of course im not acting like nothing happened, im just trying to move on with my life without looking back at the past.
So i guess my question is it ‘normal’ that i wasn’t ‘that scared’ because of the accident, and my feelings of guilt and hatred were more taking over my emotions?
5 Responses
Nikki
27 Feb 2010
choko_canyon
27 Feb 2010
You are right to put the word "normal" in quotes. Normal is a subjective term, and it’s not relevant. You feel what you feel. You ARE slightly traumatized by the accident, but instead of the trauma manifesting itself as fear or nervousness or crying etc, it’s manifesting itself as guilt and anger. Accept it, ignore what other people tell you that you "should" feel, and know that it will eventually pass and all you’ll feel is grateful that you were smart enough to wear a seat belt.
Popoffjuice
27 Feb 2010
I’ve been in several traumatic accidents and I’ve had dreams about them afterwards. However, I never showed any emotions to my parents about them and your mother seems to not realize that this could be the case.
I’m not sure why you would feel guilty about the accidents…most of the bad accidents I’ve been in I caused and I still feel guilty about them. However, there is only so much you can do- only so much guilt you can feel. Eventually, you have to move on. Your feeling of hatred should be expected- it is a natural human emotion- one that we experience to protect ourselves. With time you will completely recover and eventually you will look back on this as a vague memory.
Good luck and God bless.
justwondering
27 Feb 2010
Hard to tell what is "normal" since we all try to appear "normal" by not showing our real emotions. I sure don’t want the general population to know I have a real strong anger reflex – in fact it may be my most pervasive emotion. I do feel the whole range of emotions, but not to the level of how I feel anger. After an accident (nothing close to yours) I did not feel anything after the original panic but for a month or so after wards I did get freaked driving. You can’t be forced to feel an emotion – although living with hysterical over reactors may cause you to join in. Check out the people getting off a roller coaster – they sure are not all smiling – and wouldn’t that be a "normal" reaction to a fun amusement ride?
ryan c
27 Feb 2010
there are some people like u do not worry about it and get over it easy and too me it sounds like your mom is nice because she cares so mach but she needs to see u are ok it must have scared her wean she got the call " Madam your son wes in a car crash " at this Point she may be thinking OMG is he died is he ok is he in a coma" this may have been a big shock and making it hard to get over it but u should tell her u were scared during the accident but tell her in a nice voice "im ok mom" and may want to show her this massage if so this is for her
"i think it is great u care so mach i wish i would have had a mom like u
my mom left me and my sis and now i live with her.
Most people tend to be afraid after experiences like yours, but everyone handles trauma in their own way. You should only be concerned if you start feeling the need to act out on your hatred and anger, or if your feelings linger and leave you unable to go through your day-to-day life as you once did. In that case, you would want to seek help.